MORNING LATTE

 

“Your relationship with God is the same as your relationship with the sun.  If you hid from the sun for years and then chose to come out of darkness, the sun would still be shining as if you had never left.  You don’t need to apologize.  You just pick your head up and look at the sun.  It’s the same way when you decide to turn toward God-you just do it.” -The Untethered Soul p. 179

Being an absolute morning person I like to rise at 5 a.m. or sometimes earlier. Every day after the divorce, I would get out of bed, thanking God for the new day.  The first thing I would do was walk to the table next to my favorite overstuffed chair in the living room and light a single white taper candle, a tradition that began with Father A’s gratitude exercise.  My time in the morning solitude increased after returning from the women’s monastery.

In Greek Orthodoxy lighting candles represents Christ as the light. Every morning after I light the candle, I go make my latte. I look across the dark quiet living room from the kitchen at the flickering flame and I feel it’s God beckoning me to come and spend time together.

Prayer Warriors

As I drove to the women’s monastery in Safford, Arizona, I realized the discomfort I felt in the quiet. Having resolved not to use any technology during my trip, I kept the radio off and my cell phone was buried deep in my duffel bag in the trunk. I was fidgety not being able to tamper with various electronic devices, much like a smoker must feel who has put down the cigarettes. I began to study my surroundings and converse with God, and soon I found myself truly immersed in the beautiful countryside. I have been in love with Arizona since the first time I set foot there.

As I drove towards Safford I found myself seeing things crisply and clearly through new eyes, really taking in the breathtaking beauty. I have heard this “being in the moment” described as living life in high definition. FP and I had always talked of retiring in Flagstaff, one of my favorite small towns in Arizona, and I found myself thinking I might still do that even without him by my side. I was pleased that I could see myself living out my life’s dreams.